Cuphead is coming to Teslas and I pity the drivers


Over the weekend, Elon Musk revealed to IGN reporter Ryan McCaffrey on a podcast that Tesla can be porting indie platformer Cuphead, of all video games, to work in its vehicles. It might probably solely be performed through a USB gamepad and, given which sport we’re speaking about, I totally anticipate to see a number of of them launched out of the home windows of Teslas.

In keeping with Musk, the sport will probably be obtainable on Tesla Fashions X, 3, and S. Like earlier video games which have made it into Teslas, it will possibly solely be performed whereas the automotive is parked. It gained’t be the entire sport constructed into the automotive — there’s solely sufficient space for storing for the primary island, however I’ll remind you that island accommodates two painfully powerful platforming ranges and boss fights. They’re removed from the toughest within the sport, however they nonetheless take fairly a little bit of grit and willpower to energy via.

I do ponder whether it is a sensible sport to supply throughout drivers’ downtime. Cuphead‘s not precisely Stardew Valley: it’s not likely a chill sport that may be picked up or put down at leisure. Perhaps y’all’s expertise was a bit totally different from mine, however after I performed, Cuphead impressed in me probably the most pure, incandescent rage I’ve skilled shortly. I imply, it’s Contra by means of a Fleischer cartoon.

That labored within the sport’s favor after I was taking part in it — I’m a cussed little cuss, and after I get a rage-crush on a sport, I wish to energy via it till both I break or it does. Within the case of Cuphead, I performed and performed and performed till I beat every battle even when it took hours, only for that sense of aaaaaaaahh that got here on the end line. (Cuphead finally began crashing my PC so usually I used to be by no means in a position to end it, however I name {that a} default win for me.) If I hadn’t allotted myself sufficient time to try this, I most likely would have damaged my stunning Scarborough Truthful controller.

So how do you assume I’d have felt if I needed to cease earlier than successful as a result of I needed to drive house, pumped stuffed with adrenaline and undirected anger? I can solely think about I wouldn’t be probably the most sane or secure driver on the highway. Now I can solely hope the share of the inhabitants who drive Teslas don’t overlap with the share who’re like me — although contemplating there have been not less than two who thought it’d be a good suggestion to movie a bed room video whereas the automotive was on Autopilot, the likeliness of there being no roadragers appears slim.

I’m not saying Cuphead goes to trigger automotive crashes. Simply if we begin seeing an overabundance of enraged Tesla drivers blowing via pink lights and reducing off different vehicles after a visit to the charging station, we’d know who the possible offender is.


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